RELATIONSHIPS / COSMIC EXCUSES
CAT BLAMES AFFAIR ON VENUS. HUSBAND BLAMES DEREK.
The planets are taking a lot of blame for a very local arrangement.
CONSULT THE EVIDENCE →SUNDAY’S PAPER / OCTOBER 4, 2026
THE STREET
HEARD THINGS.
Three stories. Three overheards. No one behaved.
BREAKUPS / PERSONAL GROWTH
CAT UNVEILS REVENGE BODY. IT IS THE SAME BODY IN BETTER LIGHT.
He has changed his life. Mainly its exposure settings.
EXAMINE THE TRANSFORMATION →
CELEBRITY / RURAL AFFAIRS
FAMOUS CAT MOVES TO COUNTRY TO BE LEFT ALONE. FURIOUS THAT IT WORKS.
He wanted a normal life. Not to be treated like a normal cat.
RESPECT HIS PRIVACY →OVERHEARD BY THE VENT / OCTOBER 4, 2026
THEY SAID
WHAT NOW?
Fictional overheards. Nobody here can be trusted.
“I bought a mysterious perfume. Nobody’s asked.”— Celia, standing unnecessarily close
“She deleted the message. Luckily, I’m a terrible person.”— Iris, forwarding the screenshot
“What a cheap bastard.”— the cat, beside a birthday candle in kibble