INTERIORS / FINAL APPROVAL
NEW WHITE SOFA UNVEILED. BLACK CAT REQUESTS TEN MINUTES ALONE.
The room is finished. He disagrees.
The family unveiled its new white sofa on Saturday, describing it as “a fresh start.” Their black cat has requested ten minutes of privasy to assess the purchiss.
He praised the choice of fabric, the generus seating area and what he called “an almost reckless amount of potential.” A protective throw was rejected as premature interferense with his process.
The humans say they are hoping to keep it nice for company. He says he is company. He lives here and has never once paid rent, which makes him a distingwished guest.
THE HUMAN STORY BEHIND THE NONSENSE
Pattern inspiration: Page Six spotlights celebrity-style cloud couches in a Wayfair sale roundup. Published 2026-10-24. All characters and events in this cat story are invented. Original pattern inspiration. This is fictional cat satire, not a report about real people.
Fiction & satire. These cats and their scandals are invented.
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