JUSTICE / FIRST IMPRESSIONS
CAT REPORTS FOR JURY DUTY. HAS ALREADY DECIDED EVERYONE IS GUILTY.
She has an open mind. Nothing is getting in.
District resident Agnes arrived for jury duty with an open afternoon and a completed verdict. She had found the defendant guilty in the lift. The prosecuter too, although apparently that was not an option.
Asked whether she could set aside her personal prejudices, Agnes said she had brought them specifically. She disliked the defendant’s collar and knew his mother from an incident nobody needed to revisit.
The judge reminded her that everyone deserves a fair hearing.
Agnes agreed to hear why they thought that.
THE HUMAN STORY BEHIND THE NONSENSE
Pattern inspiration: Al Roker leaves Today early for jury duty — Page Six, 2026-09-28. This is an original fictional cat story, not a report about the real people in that coverage.
Fiction & satire. These cats and their scandals are invented.
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