DISTRICT INVESTIGATIONS
Cat Detective Investigates Shredded Curtains. Calls Attack “Highly Skilled.”
The district’s cat detective has described the shredded curtains as the work of an unusually talentid individual. He urged residents not to confuse damage with a lack of artistic sensibility.
The district’s cat detective has described the shredded curtains as the work of an unusually talentid individual. He urged residents not to confuse damage with a lack of artistic sensibility.
His initial investigashun established that the attacker had excellent reach and a sophisticated understanding of fabric. He considers this important contextual informashun.
Asked whether he should examine his own movements, the detective dismissed the suggestion as professionul jealousy.
The case remains open. He has requested fresh curtains to determine whether the suspect’s technique can be repeated under controlled condishuns.
THE HUMAN STORY BEHIND THE NONSENSE
Fictional cat story; exact canonical copy and art retained. This is fictional cat satire, not a report about real people.
Fiction & satire. These cats and their scandals are invented.
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