CULTURE / PLEASE STOP NETWORKING
CAT CONVENTION ADDS QUIET ROOM. ENTIRE CONVENTION MOVES THERE.
The keynote speaker would also like everyone to leave him alone.
Organizers of the district’s first cat convention expected the quiet room to serve a small, sensitiv minority. By nine, every attendee was inside, including the celebrity guest who had charged extra to be approchable.
The networking breakfast is untouched. A panel on building comunity was canceled after its moderator hissed at someone for coming closer. Staff have been asked to slide refunds under the door without making an announsment.
Next year’s early-bird tickets are already sold out. For an extra ten dollers, organizers promise not to tell you where it is.
THE HUMAN STORY BEHIND THE NONSENSE
Pattern inspiration: New York Comic Con marks its twentieth year with expanded fan experiences. — Variety, 2026-10-07. This is an original fictional cat story, not a report about the real people in that coverage.
Fiction & satire. These cats and their scandals are invented.
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